During the COVID-19 pandemic, my family seized an amazing cruise deal, only to face unexpected challenges when a propeller motor malfunctioned led to canceled ports. While many passengers complained, our own adventure had a different perspective, shaped by a flat tire on our way to the port. After a harrowing rush, we boarded just as the gates were closing, grateful for the experience overall, despite the setbacks.
This ordeal taught me about “beneficial absences”—the value of appreciating what didn’t happen. Research highlights three types:
- Could Have Been a Disaster (CBAD) thinking fosters gratitude by reflecting on better outcomes than expected.
- Discipline Withheld emphasizes the kindness of others who chose not to criticize us when deserved.
- Omitted Help recognizes the wisdom of allowing others to maintain their autonomy.
By reflecting on these, we expand our gratitude and deepen our appreciation for life’s hidden treasures.
